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The Daily SlackerThe Daily Slacker

Meme Evilness!

Thursday, June 30, 2005

So the sucky, evil, (yet cute...) meanie Marie over at The Single Scorpio went and popped my blogging Meme cherry and now I have to answer The 3's Meme or, presumably, something bad will happen to me.

I think I am going to have to amend the Chain Letter Protection Pact so that it covers Memes...

Be careful any future Memers... You may have 15 years of the worst luck coming to you ;O)

Anyway I guess I should get this over with since i KNOW you are all DYING to know more about me!

The 3's Meme

Three Nicknames - I have been known by Niknak, Franz (because I worked with a Hanz, and we were there to stock *clap* you up!) and now Chief Slacker.

Three Things I Like About Myself - My friendly personality, My sense of Humor, and my high alcohol tolerance! Mmmm whiskey.

Three Things That Scare Me - The idea of falling from a high height, finding someone to love and then losing them, being paralyzed.

Three Everyday Essentials - Air, Sustenance, and now blogging ;O)

Three Things I'm Wearing Right Now - Boxers, a Copper/Brass/Silver with magnets in it, and now this keyboard is wearing pretty badly...

Three Fave Bands Growing Up - Def Lepard, Metallica, And whoever did the music for Sesame Street, man they were hardcore!

2 Truths and a Lie - The vast majority of republican voters voted that way because of a few issues that don't actually affect their lives, Meme's Suck, and I've never drank a drop of alcohol in my entire life! Really! I mean it!

Three Things I Can't Do Without - Sex, Drugs and ROCK N ROLL! WOO! Oh, wait, not true. Umm, Friends (and not that lame ass TV show!), Hope and Faith (Again, NOT the lame ass TV show)

Three Things I Can Certainly Live Without - Idiots, the DMV (I'll count those as one since they're basically the same...), Tom Cruise (Dammit, that's still the same thing!), Light Beer (unless it's a substitute for water), and Bills.

Three Places I Want to Go On Vacation - The UK, Puerto Rico again, and the Island of Endless Free Liquor and Sex With Hotties. Ok, that last one sounds dangerous... no one would ever leave! Hmm, Anywhere fun!

Three Things I Want to Do Before I Die - definitely fall madly in love and have a family, Travel through every state and as many countries as possible, and invent one thing that changes people lives.

So there you have it. My first Meme. SO I guess this is the part where I have to tag poor souls and force them to do this as well? I'll do it this once, and then after that the amendment to the Pact will be in place and anyone who Tags me involuntarily will have some bad, bad mojo coming their way!

My victims shall be (in no particular order): Jadedprimadonna, Red Sox Bat Girl Amy, and Aurora.

TAG! You three are it, no givebacks!

There the evilness has been passed on. Slackerdom is now free of the cloud cast upon it by Wickedish Witch of the West, Marie ;O) now on to amending that Pact...

posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:06 AM, ,

Tour Slackerdom!

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

So, since a bunch of you did want to see pictures of my furnished condo. I decided I would.

I'm still in the process of putting things on the wall, but the tour is complete for the most part.

Wander on over to the Visual Edition and check it out!

Also, about half the shares of The Daily Slacker are sold... Get yours while the getting is good! :O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 1:32 PM, ,

Now Listed.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

After browsing a link Aurora put up over on Shnookaland, I found out that my blogs are listed on BlogShares.

Instead of being worth the typical starting B$0.20 The Daily Slacker is already worth B$1.09. Nice.

I suggest you all go out and buy shares now before the price skyrockets ;O)

I still says BUTTONS!!!!

posted by Chief Slacker @ 4:18 PM, ,

And Another One Bites the Dust...

So last night I decide to give The New Redhead and her Friend a call to see how Saturday went and to see what they were up to for the week. I decided since The Friend was the one to call and invite me, I would call her first.

No answer, left a message again.

Next I call The New Redhead. She does answer.

TNR: "Hello?"

Me: "Hey how's it going, it's 'Slacker'."

TNR: "OH! Hey! How are you? What you up to?"

Me: "Not much just got home from work. How was Spin?"

TNR: "It was fun! Very loud though, sorry we got cut off."

Me: "No prob, what ya up to?"

TNR: "We're just getting something to eat."

Me: "Cool, who ya with?"

TNR: "Just my boyfriend."

Me: .oO(DAMMIT!) "Cool!"

That sound you hear is the pieces falling together in my head. It's like at the end of The Sixth Sense when you figure out Bruce Willis is dead. So many odd parts of the rest of the movie makes sense.

The New Redhead was the more chatty, flirty one of the two, but The Friend WAS the first to give out her number, and she WAS the one to call and invite me out. Suddenly it make sense.

I swear, you non-single women need to wear buttons or something. At least then us poor unsuspecting guys know what we're getting into. None of this talk and flirt and seem like you're interested stuff, only to drop the B-word later!

Yes, a lot of guys might resemble big, dumb animals, but we're people too! We might be cute and cuddly, but we deserve better than to be toyed with like that! We're the hunter gatherers, going after the big game, not big games to play with! You women came from a GUY's rib and this is the thanks we get!?


It should be a law or something. I think I'll call my senator.

At least The Readhead's Friend is cute too. Just not redhead. If she drops the B-word I'm callin' Bush.

Edit: I'm really not all that bummed out, so don't worry, just had to rant ;O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:21 AM, ,

He Give, and He Taketh Away...

Monday, June 27, 2005

This past weekend could have been awesome...

..It wasn't.

Friday night I was dead tired. Then of course OCD-anxiety girl calls and asks if I can come with and help her get an air conditioner. To get me there she bribes me with getting her employee discount on a couple new fans for my place. Little did I know this also meant she expected me to install it too. A tired, hot sweaty Chief is not a happy one.

For the record GE, it would be nice if you supplied screws that actually fit nicely in the holes for those stupid side skirt things.

So Saturday I had plans to hang out with Conservative Girl. We were going to hang out for dinner and then see some fireworks at the Pride Festival not to far away.

Of course, Saturday morning I find out D, a good friend of mine who now moved like 5 hours north of here, is going to be in town. I talk with a friend of his, Big Mike, and said I would give them a call after I dropped off CG. I get a "Sounds good" from Big Mike.

A little later that day, while waiting for CG to come over, The New Redhead's Friend calls to see what I'm up to. She was a little confused and thought I had met her at Brother's on Friday night instead of William's on Thursday... But we got that straightened out. She says they're going to be downtown and that I should meet up with them. Score! I told them I would give them a call later as well.

I do the dinner thing with CG, we hang out and watch the fireworks, and I drop her off at home. Everything's going as planned... Now for Saturday night, Part 2!

So I call up both Big Mike and D. No answers. I leave them both messages and also text messages to get a hold of me.

Next, time to call the ladies. I call up New Redhead's Friend to find out where they're at. No answer. Ok, this night's going downhill in a hurry.

So i decide I should also call The New Redhead to make sure... She answers! It's loud so the conversation sucks, but I find out they're as Spin. Great! Then we get cut off.

One problem, I have NO idea where Spin is. It's a new nightclub and I hadn't been there yet. I call her back, but get no answer. I leave both the New Redhead and her friend TMs hoping they might notice. No dice. I even asked three people on the street where it was and got no answer and called 411, to find out and they didn't know either. They better not charge me $1.25 for not giving me an answer...

So yeah, after spending about an hour trying to find the damn place, I give up. I try calling the boys back again, still get no answer. And the night is over.

Sunday I end up having too much to do, not to mention it's 87° and 75% humidity outside. So that's a non-day.

I figure tonight I'll give The New Redhead and her friend a call and see if they want to grill out or something this week before Kickball on thurs. Since they called me, I assume they're interested in hanging out.

That is, of course, they really remember who I am. ;O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:21 AM, ,


Friday, June 24, 2005

I have an addiction. Yes, it's true. While I'm not so sure I really want to cure this addiction, I believe it must be recognized. My addiction is nothing ordinary like alcohol, drugs or gambling, it's something potentially much more dangerous.

So today I am taking my first step and admitting to all of you that, well...

...I'm addicted to Readheads.

I just can't help myself. I can't. I try, really I do! But there's just nothing I can do.

I have nothing against Blondes, Brunettes, or any others at all, but the redheads just overpower me.

Take an average looking girl, give her red hair, and I will be attracted.

Take a hot girl, give her red hair, especially if it's curly, I'll do my best not to drool.

I'm like a bug going for the purple light. I know I'm going to get burned, but I just have to make contact. HAVE TO.

So yeah, there's my confession. Yup.

Anyway, last night at kickball it was fun. We lost, but we lost in style. Drained a case of crappy beer water and downed mass quantities of jello shots. The post game was pretty lame, either everyone was toasted after playing kickball in 96 degrees and high humidity or they were just being lazy. Like usual our team was the rowdy one, playing flip cup. At one point we got a couple random girls playing, that made things a lot better :O)

A couple of the girls were with a group of friends, and one of them was a redhead. Yeah, that's why I wrote the confession. I said to one of my teammates, "Wow, there's a nice group of ladies. I'll take the redhead, you can have the rest."

Usually at this point, I try and talk to her, probably come off lame, and either get shut down or get a fake number. I decided to just keep playing flip cup and when that died down they disappeared for a while.

About 30 min later I'm chatting with a buddy, and these two girls walk up and ask us about kickball since the league shirts are huge walking advertisements. If you haven't guessed, it was the redhead and one of the other girls...


We told them our team needed a few more girls, they were all excited about it and gave me their numbers.

Double Score!

Either God smiled on me, or is taunting me again. Stay tuned ;O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:34 AM, ,

Visual VOTE Results!

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Ok here are the results:

For me:

For the Condo:

And as the tie-breaker, since Sarah said the word "You" in her commet before "Condo" the "YOUs" have it!

Stay tuned for the Visual Edition!

P.S. Those THREE of you who didn't vote (and you know who you are!) SUCK! :O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 4:00 PM, ,

Visual VOTE!!!

Ok people, you have till 4pm CDT.

The vote is for what will go up on The Daily Slacker: Visual Edition today.

You have these two choices:

A) Pictures of my furnished Condo.

B) Pictures of Me.

Ok, I know how many of you will have come here after I post this, every one of you better vote! :O)

The winning choice will be posted by 4:30.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:22 AM, ,

Advice Time.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Ok, so I seem to have about 20 visitors a day, and using the comments as a base, it seem females are more active than the guys. I figure that gives me a pretty good base to ask for some advice:

How does one "Get the girl?"

I took this quiz thingy today that I happened on at a fellow blogger's site called "How Leo are you?" It asks you some questions and then tells you how your personality ranks according the traits your Zodiac sign typically has. I was 93% Leo.

My one tripping point in the quiz was the statement "You've got a near 100% track record in seducing anyone you're interested in."

That's a big negative.

The advice I usually get at this point is usually one of two things: 1) Be yourself or 2) Be more aggressive.

So lets see, that whole thing about being yourself. That's a crock of crap. Yeah, I understand that I don't want to try and act like a different person. If I did she'll like that and not the real me and be disappointed later. But if I really am the typical, real me, I'm going to be a nice, fairly shy guy. I'm incredibly outgoing with a group, or people I'm not that interested in, but get me in front of a girl I'd be interested in and you get nothing. So somehow I need to not be my usual self, but make sure that my typical personality traits show through.

As for being more aggressive, I guess I just don't know how. I would try and stick with it more, but then I just feel like I'm being some creepy stalker guy. Whichever woman it was that came up with the whole idea of "playing hard to get" should have been shot right after she had the though. Nowadays the line between playing hard to get and I'm just being nice to you till I try to get you kicked out of the bar is sometimes infinitely small.

The whole movie scenario of the nice guy bumping into the girl and them striking up a convo is awfully rare. The reality is usually as the nice guy is thinking of something to say, the pompous prick steps in and walks away with the girl only to break her heart later after he plays her.

When I was a kid, my mom tells me we'd go out to the races and I'd pick the seats by the cute teenage girls. By the end of the night they be buying me candy and stuff. My cousin always wanted to babysit me so he could pick up chicks ;O) Where the hell'd that mojo go?

maybe after being screwed over by a couple chicks gave me a little shell I need to break back out of? I'm sure about 50% of my problem is just getting the confidence.

So how about it people? Let's get some insight here, non of the little "Just be yourself" rhetoric.

Ladies, what would win you over and make you want to talk to a guy? Guy, what have you done that's won over a girl?

Speak up!

posted by Chief Slacker @ 1:45 PM, ,

Worms: Armageddon

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

So my attack against the worms in my yard hit it's second wave. This time I was beginning to dig out the sidewalk on the side of the building.

I made it about fifteen feet and then ran out of gas. The storm I mentioned below in my previous post made it a lot easier to scrape the dirt off of the sidewalk, but it also made it a lot heavier.

After diggin it out, I weeded the dirt and then transported it to our front patch of lawn. We're going to have to reseed that. One of my building mates found out that when Round-Up says safe on grass, it must not have meant OUR grass. So we figured some fresh dirt might do the area well.

I also found out our Wheelbarrow is not near as stable as one would wish it to be. At one point I had it nice and full with a load when it decided to tip over and bury me calf high in dirt. Note to the manufacturer, those plastic brackets between the metal frame and Fiberglas bucket flex WAY to much.

Anyway, we now have a bit of sidewalk. Hopefully soon the rest will be dug out and then we can landscape it and make it look all pretty. Not to mention it would be nice if it didn't get grown over again ;O)

Check out all of the pictures on the Visual Edition!

Edit: I did indeed steal this title from the name of a game. People who don't like worms *cough*Marie*cough* should check it out. Defintiely hilarious.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 12:53 PM, ,

Kick Ass Storm

My slacking time was huge yesterday. Thanks mother nature!

About 1:00pm yesterday I happened to look out the window and saw a whole bunch or dark cloudy goodness. At that point I announced to some of my coworkers: "Oooh, that's looking fun!"

Sure enough, about 1:15 the rain starts up with some might nice wind as well. About 1:20 the lights in our building cut on and off a couple time, finally giving up and losing power at about 1:25. So, like the geeky engineer types we are what do we do? Gather in an internal room like all the news people tell you to? Hell no. We gather by the windows and oogled at the storm :O) Rain with 60mph winds with thunder and lightning is fun to watch from a well constructed building!

Funny part was that we're in building two and building one still had power. Problem for them was all of the network servers are in building two, and were either not on generator back-up, or got knocked out by the storm.

About 3ish the power came back on, but not the network. At 3:45 it still wasn't up so Dumbass (My Boss) did a suprisingly non-dumbass thing and let everyone go home and said he would punch us out later at our 8 hours. Gotta love getting paid to watch a storm :O)

Here's a picture of the radar at about 2:00, we're MSP:

Pretty huh?

So I went home and pissed off more worms.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:15 AM, ,

The Weekend

Monday, June 20, 2005

So I'm sure you're all dying to know how the weekend went right?

Ok, OK! Stop begging! I'll tell you already.


SO Friday was the "Mid season warm up party" at my place. Started way slow, but got going pretty well. I told people we'd start grilling at 6, but no one showed till 7:30. After that they trickled in pretty regularly. Got up to a good 20 people or so including all four of my neighbors, except the couple from unit 3. Collectively we went through a couple cases of beer and a liter each of Beam and Bacardi.

As the party dwindled and the neighbors went to sleep, I decided to should be the nice neighbor and call it a night for my party. The remaining kickball peeps and I went over to a teammates house that lives about 5 blocks away. We chilled there for a bit and then decided to go close down a bar a block up the street, which we did then almost got in a fight.

One of the guys made some stupid comment about a guys shirt being a "gay green shirt." Unfortunately the guy was gay. So he gets all bitchy my friend apologizes profusely, but the guy just keeps being an ass. A group for other people comes out of the bar, apparently looking for a fight because they start talking shit and at one point claim a different fried a half block away who had nothing to do with it "hates gay people" so one of them runs down the block and tries to start a fight with him.

God I hate stupid drunk people.

Ended up all going peacefully though.


That was the WAKA Mid season Party. Started drinking at 4:30. Our party had free keg beer with a 5$ donation to the Children's Cancer Research Fund. Definitely had a good time. Unfortunately my team lost in the Championship Flip Cup tourney match, but we had fun anyway and donated our second place winnings back to the kids.

Some other buddies showed up at the same bar just about the time that the Mid Season Party shut down. A couple Jag Bombs later I was ready to go again. We shut down that bar, headed to the food joint across the street. I tell ya, a greasy burger and fries at 3 in the morning sure does hit the spot.


Got up, did some cleaning, gave a tour of my new condo to OCD-Anxiety girl's mom since she hadn't seen the place. After that, they went over to her brothers to help them get their new place into shape.

A little later, I went out to lunch with Conservative Girl's family who is in town for an extended weekend. I was rather surprised at this considering "The Talk" last week. They did know about it and were still super nice. This transition to friend is going way better than expected. Hopefully this isn't a calm before the storm.

After lunch, I gave them a tour of the new place as well, then we went out to an Art Fair in Minneapolis. Everyone (including myself) was surprised I didn't buy something for the new place. The problem was everything I liked was way too expensive. I found a beautiful set of 3 square paintings that would have looked awesome in my place, but the set was $2400. Yeah right. Oh well.

Chilled out the rest of the night.

All in all it was a good weekend. Though, like usual it's Monday and I want a nap.

Wake me when it's lunch time ;O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:13 AM, ,

Let the Weekend Begin!

Friday, June 17, 2005

Ok, time to go enjoy that nice weather I've been fantasizing about since lunch. Have a good weekend everyone and enjoy the artwork I put up on the Visual Edition!

posted by Chief Slacker @ 4:05 PM, ,

Bad Mistake.

I think I just made the worst mistake any cubicle worker can make.

I sat outside for lunch.

When you come to work it's not that big of a temptation for some reason. Maybe it's because you're late, or worrying about traffic, or that you leave so early that the sun isn't even up yet or maybe it's just because you're simply not awake yet. Anyway, good weather on the way in to work just seems to go unnoticed.

On lunch however, it gets noticed. Grab your lunch, find a spot at one of the table on the patio under the nifty umbrella and dig in. Eat, chat with coworkers, eat... But once you're all done, and the half hour is up, somehow you still can't get up. Apparently, the nice weather has paralyzed you from the waist down. It's definitely an amazing phenomenon among cubicle dwellers.

You get the same conversation when one idiot just has to pipe up:

Idiot: "Well, it's 11:30, guess we should head in."

Me: "No it's not, it's 11:20"

Idiot: "Uhh, it says right here it's..."

Me: "11:20!!!"

When good weather is involved, time is irrelevant. Until, of course, you do actually go back inside. Now, my cubicle is fun and all, I have artwork I drew on the wall, an octopus made of Sobe caps, a lava lamp and a nifty one foot tall statue of Marvin the Martian. It's got nothing on a beautiful day though. Nothing.

And to make things worse, I am having a party type thing at my place tonight. Grilling outside will be involved. Outside. You can see the problem: four more hours of cubicle torture and I have the beautiful outside on the brain.

Luckily they positioned all of our computer corners facing away from the window or there's no chance of getting any work done. All the managers would hear is "I don't care how much money this new medical device is going to make, can you see how nice it is outside!" Either that, or it was to torture us by having the sun beat on our screens as it starts going down. The first one would be much worse.

Arg! Beautiful weather! Beer Brats! Whiskey!

Huh? What do you mean i still have to work for three and a half more ours?



posted by Chief Slacker @ 11:59 AM, ,

Condo Pics!

Thursday, June 16, 2005

I posted a bunch of pictures of my new Condo as the inaugural post on The Daily Slacker: Visual Edition. Check em out!

posted by Chief Slacker @ 1:28 PM, ,

Worms Hate Me.

So last night after work I decide that since it was a nice day, I was going to go to work on the garden area we're thinking about having behind our house. Seemed like a pretty simple yet, physical task.

To get the garden area ready to be useful, about two to three inches of the top needed to be skimmed off. A while back it had been covered with a layer of sand in an attempt to kill off any weeds that were back there. Apparently it worked for about a year or so.

A week ago some building mates and I hacked (we're talking machete here) down all the tall weeds and junk and got it presentable. One of the bigger problems was a few plants that resembled rhubarb, but wasn't. We hacked it down and chopped it off a couple inches below the surface but a week later new leaves were sprouting up.

So I decide to have at it and dig that out, as well as starting to remove the top layer. In the process I think I displaced about 82 worms. So, I dig out the first couple just fine, but when I moved to the back of the area I dig down about 5 inches and hit what I thought was a big rock. I start digging around it and find out it's a couple feet across. I start digging the other way and it just keeps going, and going... After I realized it was rather smooth it dawned on me.

It's a sidewalk.

I walk straight out from the back of the building to where it would meet the main sidewalk in the front and hit the ground with the shovel. Sure enough, 1/2 an inch below the moss and grass is more sidewalk.

This building is over one hundred yeas old (built in 1880 according to city records), so suddenly I start feeling like an archeologist, digging out some lost path long forgotten. It would be interesting if I can find the a seal on the sidewalk anywhere telling when they might have made it, but I haven't dug that far. Maybe Sunday I can dig a little more and get it all cleared off.

Having a path through garden area might be fun! I'll have to take some pictures.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:59 AM, ,

Night of the Exes

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Apparently I'm emanating a vibe that I'm single again. It's even strong enough to reach to South Carolina!

So last night I figured I would put in a long night at work. I ended up only working till 6 when I got a TM from one of my Exes asking what was up and saying I should come over. Haven't talked to her in at least a month.

Left there about 7 and on the way home OCD-Anxiety called. I planned on finishing grouting the tile backsplash in my kitchen, she said she would come over and help out. In true OCD-Anxiety girl form, she did come over, then just whined about being hungry till we ate something. Never did get to finish the backsplash.

After she left though, I noticed I has a missed call from a number I didn't recognize. I then remembered that earlier yesterday a long lost Ex of mine, "Runt," from South Carolina (Florence for you SCians) had IMed me and we chatted a little bit online. I gave her my number and she had called to catch up! I called her back and we ended up talking for a good hour and a half. It was nice to catch up!

We dated for a good while, up to about three years ago. We met on a college website and hit it off. She came up to MN to visit whenever we could afford it. The distance ended up getting in the way though and we drifted a bit. Then I met The Girl I Thought I Would Marry. After GITIWM and I split I ended up going down to SC to visit her and after I came back we had a pretty bit spat and didn't talk much if at all for the last several years.

Apparently she had been busy while we weren't talking. She ended up getting married to a guy she had been dating when I last talked to her. I had kind of warned her that I didn't think he was all that good of a guy, but that just led to another spat and also to us not talking until yesterday. Apparently a couple months after they got married and they moved back to where he lived, he turned into a pretty big jerk. She ended up leaving him 6 weeks after moving there and they divorced a little bit after that. For the record the "told you so" came from her, I never once mentioned a thing.

I do have a good knack for picking up on people's true personalities though. Any of you who aren't sure of someone, let me at them and I can give you a pretty good idea of whether they're being true or not. That's probably what used to make me such a good salesman, I can usually pick up on people's personalities very quickly.

It was fun talking with Runt again. We got to stroll down memory lane a little bit catch up on the last couple years of each other's lives. Good times! We really did have a lot of fun when we were together! Really no bad times either, except for the post retry spat and ensuing tension.

Always good to catch back up with a Thought-To-Be-Lost friend! Hopefully we can stay in touch!

posted by Chief Slacker @ 8:56 AM, ,

"Talk" Update

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

It is hereby official. Apparently one of the perks that comes with my promotion is singledom! I'm am now single.

After talking to CG today we agreed put the ambiguity left after the Non-Talk Talk to rest. We are officially just friends (basically the same as it has been the last year)

No more sillyness. Much more singleness.

Now the hard part... getting a date... heh. I'm throwing a party this Friday. hopefully some of the single females from kickball will show!

Let the phone numbers flood in!

Or some smart beatuiful cutie, like August's long lost twin she left behind in the Twin Cities, can just come and sweep me off of my feet.

Nah, my luck's not that good. This will take some work. ;O)

posted by Chief Slacker @ 2:50 PM, ,

Cyber Promotion!

Ok, so in browsing through blogdom, I realized that just using Nick B as my screen name was pretty lame, and also very much not unique.

To remedy this, I had a conversation with myself and decided that it would be a good time to give myself a promotion.

So, from here on out, Nick B has now been promoted to the position of Chief Slacker.

I hope it comes with a raise.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 12:29 PM, ,

The Non-Talk "Talk"

Monday, June 13, 2005

So as expected, the car ride home was interesting.

It started with her apologizing that the wedding sucked and me asking why we had gone through all of this trouble for her to go to a wedding of a friend that she really hasn't done anything with in the last tree years. They chat online once and a while, but that's about it. If it was me, I would send a card, not drive 6 hours and buy a $60 gift. She kinda snapped at me that she wouldn't invite me to anymore weddings then. I said weddings are fine depending on who it's for and then we got talking about who's going to get married next and who we would have as people in our weddings.

That seemed like a pretty good transition point into The Talk, but I had no idea exactly how I was going to start it. After another half our or so I figured it out and decided to ask her if she was in love with me. Before I could get it out, she up and says: "'Cookie' at work asked me if we are in love."

Ok, weird.

So yeah, here's the ensuing conversation:

Conservative Girl: "'Cookie at work asked me if we are in love."

Me: "Do you think we are?"

CG: "I don't know, do you?"

Me: "I don't really know. I guess for me, I don't really feel like I think I should feel if I were in love. What about you?"

CG: "I don't know, I guess it's about the same for me."

Me: "Have you ever been in love?"

CG: "Yeah, once."

So then we got talking about what was different with our relationship than from the last times we felt in love. We got talking about the things that bothered each other. I brought up everything I've complained about in earlier blogs: Her conservative nature, how a lot of the things I have fun doing, she doesn't so it makes it hard sometimes, her chronic lateness, the messiness of her car and home, even brought up the frustration with the physical side of things.

She told me the problems she had with me: That I don't compliment her all that much, that I don't seem to include her all the time, that some of the things she suggests we do I don't seem all that interested in.

She asked if the Physical thing was the biggest thing and I said "No, the biggest problem I think is that it doesn't seem like the chemistry is really there." She pretty much agreed. I also said that I wasn't sure why I don't compliment her as much and all of that. Usually I am the chivalrous type, opens doors, compliments, pays for dinner, all of that. But with here it just doesn't seem to come out. All I could use to explain it was the lack of chemistry.

So I then had to ask "So, why are we still dating? If we're not in love, we're more like friends than anything, why still be kinda dating after two years?"

This was a great answer. heh.

CG: "Well, i figure after year three, if we're not in love, then we should just be friends."

Year three?

Look up patience in the dictionary and it HAS to have her picture there. Willing to date for three years just to find out if she might fall in love at some point. See what I mean by her being overly nice? Do any of you honestly know someone who would date a guy for that long, just to find out if she would fall in love? Wow.

We got talking about where we were in life. It came down to the part where she's pretty settled in life, done with school, working for a company she wants to stay with and all that. For me, it was the exact opposite, I don't know where I'll be in three years, I like the company I work for, but once I finish my degree I'll take the best offer I can get. I'm not sure if I want to move, or any of that.

Got talking about lifestyle too. She's much more conservative in what she does, not going to bars much or parties, or basically anything with lots of people. I'm all for all of that. I like to hang out with my friends and have fun. The biggest thing was my ADD. I always have so much going on in my head and that tends to spill over into my life. I always am busy, going here and there, doing this and that. My life is usually busy. It's one of those things I've learned to live with. For the most part people don't notice it till they get to know me really well. I think in some ways the ADD helps me. I can multitask like crazy, I work on two projects on two computers at the same time and I feel I'm a lot more creative because I can be thinking about ideas for one thing while working on another. It's something that's not going to change. So all of that might be leading to the lack of chemistry. We're just too different personally.

We also got into a big talk about religion and what we wanted as far as that goes. Got talking about what we think of the bible and all of that. Definitely a good conversation.

So yeah, we hashed out all of the differences and problem and all of that. Agreed we're not in love with each other and don't really see being married at this point.

So in essence, it was The Talk. The catch? No conclusion.

I realize when I got back up to my condo after she left we never really settled what we are. Still dating? Just friends? Not talking anymore?

It was just a hug goodbye, no goodnight kiss like usual, so who knows if that means anything. Guess we'll see?

Well anyway, that was a long enough post. Look for part 2 once I figure out what the two hours of Non-Talk, Talk really was...

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:41 AM, ,

The Most Boring Wedding Ever...

Sunday, June 12, 2005

That was horrible.

First off, the church it was at was hideous. I'm not a super religious guy, but I guess I believe that a house of God should look the part. This place looked like a cheap convention center wanna-be where some people were playing church. It had a super high ceiling so things echoed a lot, had the whole exposed girder and ventilation thing going on and the front was pretty much just a stage. That and stage was about 25 feet from the first pews, so there was this huge open area. And to top off the whole cheap "let's play church" feeling, the cross in the center of the stage was coming apart. Instead of having a solid wood cross, it was basically two crossed hollow boxes. The side of the long portion was coming apart and you could see all of the little joint tabs. What is it with all these commercial like churches nowadays?

Anyway, the ceremony was pretty long. When the one pastor (they had two) started giving "Words about the Bride," that apparently translated into English as "Her whole life story from middle school on". The other pastor talking about the groom gave a quick funny story then talked of his character quick. Not a 20 minute retelling of his life.

The brother and sister of the bride sang a duet at one point... Ow. The sister was good, had a nice voice and all. The brother? Karaoke gone bad. He sounded like he might have had potential if he sang about two octaves lower. In the beginning of the song he tried to hit this high note and missed terribly. I did one of those choke laughs. You know, the ones where you want to laugh, but know it would be totally inappropriate so you choke it down. I recorded some of it on my PDA, so I'll have to see if I can get it up on here.

The reception was held in the same church as the wedding, so you walked out of the sanctuary, down the hall like 20 feet and found a table. Unfortunately they didn't take pictures or any of that beforehand, so we had to wait about an hour before the bridal party actually did the little grand march thing.

After the party got there, they started serving buffet style dinner. Several of the people who were there talked up this lady and said she always does an excellent job catering and stuff, so I was looking forward to something special for dinner. It turned out to be dinner by Ikea. For those of you who don't know the wondrous place called Ikea. It's basically a Swedish Wal-Mart but for home furnishings. Tons of relatively cheap but cool furniture. They also have cafes in them and serve up tons of Swedish meatballs. That pretty much describes the dinner. Ikea Swedish meatballs green beans and salad.

Since it was in the church, there was no dancing whatsoever. I'm fine missing the chicken dance and all the other lame crap they do at weddings, but come on. You expect some entertainment or some sort of real celebration at the wedding. Not just dinner.

And to top it off. No alcohol either. We toasted to the speeches with plastic cups with water in them. WATER!

So everyone eats, they cut cake, 20 minutes later they toss the bouquet and garter, then maybe a half hour later they had the rose petal send off and it was all done. Started at 3, done before 7. That was NOT worth 6 hours here and 6 hours back.

If I didn't get to hang out in Madison, Wi (AKA College partytown USA) tomorrow I'd really be pissed about this whole thing. Arg, I need a drink and I know there isn't a drop of alcohol in this house. Her mom was afraid people might see the beer in her house after she made beer brats for them one time a while back she had to give the leftover beer to the neighbor.

If any of you out there in cyber geekdom have perfected transporter technology, wanna beam me a whiskey diet? Or maybe a nice scotch on the rocks?

The ride home is going to be interesting.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 12:50 AM, ,

Procrastinator Extraordinaire!

Friday, June 10, 2005

Several of you commented that I'm procrastinating on the whole Conservative Girl/"Talk" thing. Am I?

Damn Skippy.

August has a great post about thinking over the whole situation to make sure you're not making a mistake. That's definitely not the case here.

At this point it's pretty silly that we're still dating. It's almost definitely a dating just to be dating scenario. We've known each other a little over two years, been "dating" for a good chunk of that. Never once has the L word been used. Several times the subject of the future has come up, and the best either of us can muster is "I don't know, I hadn't really thought about it." If that's not a tip off, I don't know what is.

Problem is, I don't really want to NOT be dating. I do like her, but I don't have any real feelings and there are several things that downright bother me with her sometimes. I guess it just feels nice to be dating someone. I guess part of me thinks that she's a sweet girl, tons of potential, I should like her. Arg.

Another reason I'm still "dating" her, and this is probably screwed up, is because I worry for her being out there with other guys. What I mean is that she's overly nice and extremely naive. She is almost definitely going to get taken advantage of by someone and end up hurt. As an example, she was hanging out with one of her guy friends, and invited another friend to come out. The first one got mad and now doesn't hang out with her. She had no idea why he would be like that. I said "It's simple, he was hanging out with you hoping to get a piece, and with another friend there, that wasn't going to happen." Naive with a capital N. Is being protective justification to be dating just to be dating?

Arg, the whole thing just sucks. Not to mention I'm soooo off my game for trying to go out and find dates. It's been about 4 years since I was really out in the "singles" crowd. Blah.

I'm outta here in a couple minutes, I'm probably going to end up going to the wedding. I need a ride to my parents place anyway and it's near there.

Why can't things be simple? I'm afraid of being the asshole, so I'm being nicer than I should. But now I kinda feel like that's making me become the asshole anyway.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:17 AM, ,

Postponed on Account of Musical.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

So "The Talk" didn't happen tonight as planned.

Conservative Girl wanted to see She Loves Me at the Guthrie Theater since it was closing at the end of this week. Since I had the opportunity to get free tickets to it we went.

Unfortunately, the play didn't get done until 10:30 and she had to scurry home to check on her rabbit. I swear she's more worried about the bunny, than most people are about their kids. It's crazy.

So I'm going to be going to this wedding, and having to meet all of these so called friends of hers that she hasn't see or barely talked to since High School. I personally wouldn't call those friends. Talking maybe once or twice in 6 years isn't really a friend, it's just someone I knew in high school. But to each their own I guess.

The other thing that's going to piss me off is that CG shmucked a deer a couple weeks ago and her car is in the shop. Well, if it gets done Friday she'll want to leave Friday right away after work. Never mind I have and invite to go to a party and watch the local minor league baseball team, The Saints, play. She can't wait till Saturday morning to go. Nope. She's already going to pay 20% of 14 days worth of car rental, what's one more? I even offered to pay for it.

I should just tell her I don't want to go to the wedding since I really don't. I just don't feel like playing the asshole. Arg.

At least it's down to 75° in here today.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:22 AM, ,

I think I'm Stuck to My Chair...

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Ok, it's currently 1:56pm 83.5°F in here right now. That's 28.5°C for you metrics.

That's INSIDE the office. The rest of the building is like 72°.

I think my brain stops functioning properly at about 80.

This is crazy.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 1:56 PM, ,

Sorry, Not in Service.

Ok, so make that a big 0 for 2.

I called up the Fine Lass last night. Again a female answered, but this time is was just a nice recorded operator saying "We're sorry, the number ###-###-#### is not in service. If you believe you received this message in error, please hang up and try again."

Yes, there is some chance that I wasn't totally sober and hit the wrong button, but I doubt it.

What's the deal with giving out fake or wrong numbers? Just don't give the damn thing out if you don't want a call. Be a big girl. Either say no thanks, or at least give out the number to the Rejection Hotline!

I hate the whole be nice now and have someone else give the rejection later deal.

Worst I've had was at my favorite local pub, I bought a round of shots for all of my friends, and a couple cute girls on the other side of the bar. They accepted the shots and a little while later I went over and chatted with them for maybe five minutes. They were asking the questions, carrying the conversation. Twenty minutes later I stopped by again, but this time the bartender interrupted.

"Ummm, Nick. You need to stop talking to them. They complained that you're bothering them."

"Are you serious???"

"Yeah man, if I didn't know ya, I'd have to ask you to leave right now."

"Dude, that's fucked up."

"Hey man, nothing I can do."

I understand the policy. The owner of the place is a woman, being protective of the female patrons. But seriously, THEY carry the convo, then tell the bartender I'M bothering them? Just tell me to piss off and I'd be fine with that. Tell me you're having a girls night. Fine. But to take the shots, actively talk with me, then tell the bartender I'm bothering them? Come on.

Have some respect, at least be honest with the person.

And don't give me the crap about being nice by letting them think they have a number or whatever. That's just being cruel.

This is why I keep dating Conservative Girl. Trying to get a date nowadays just friggin sucks.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 12:21 PM, ,

We got your disease!

So when Axel Rose was singing: "If you got the money honey, we got your disease" I now know what company he was talking about.

This morning while I was driving to work I looked over at a Semi next to me to read the back of it's Trailer. On the back it had the name of the company and then the phone number you can call to get a hold of them I presume. The problem was the phone number.

The phone number was one of those that uses words instead of numbers to make it easier to remeber. They sure made it memorable.

The name of the company was Standard Shipping. Maybe it was Standard Trasportation, but Standard part is all that matters.

The phone number to get a hold of them?


Yes, that's right. Got an STD? Need to ship it? They'll be there for you.

I don't care what they ship, but I know I'm not touching it ;O)

Edit: Apparently it'd Standard Forwarding... Forwarding STD's one truckload at a time! Thanks Goddess

posted by Chief Slacker @ 8:54 AM, ,

The Talk is Looming

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

So yeah, this weekend I'm supposed to be going to a wedding for one of Conservative Girl's friends or relative or something like that. Very much not looking forward to it. Everyone I've met that she was friends with in High School or College or related to has been way way boring. I feel like one of the kids who get sucked into Pleasantville and start turning all the people colors. I'm definitely a lot more of Reese Witherspoon's character than Tobey McGuire though, making out in back seats instead of working at the burger joint.

Anyway, I feel so horribly out of place it's ridiculous. I was brought up in mediocre public schools, all of them were sheltered little private schoolers. I like bars and having a drink with my friends. CG didn't have a drink till she was 23 and a lot of her family and friends don't drink at all. Just not my crowd at all.

We've needed to have "The Talk" for months now, but we never do. We're going to hang out either tonight or more likely tomorrow and really should have the talk at some point. But what about the wedding?

Do I just be nice and stick it out till after the wedding. Don't bring anything up until after? Or do we have "The Talk" this week anyway? I know neither of us are that happy dating, and the only reason we're not "just friends" is because we're both to nice to bring it up. Hell, for the last couple months we've been acting as "just friends" anyway, not like we did anything romantic or physical.

Just gotta suck it up and have "The Talk." Would I be a huge asshole to do it before the wedding though? At the same time I feel bad for doing the wedding thing and it all being a show.


posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:33 AM, ,

The Weekend

Monday, June 06, 2005

So how about that update on life? I know all 3 of you have been holding your breath and sitting at the end of your seat waiting to find out how my weekend went weren't you? Don't lie!

So let's see...


Kickball rocked! Our team, Your Team Sucks, finally won a game. We had Jello shots on first and third/home plate. Made for good incentive in our 5-4 victory. I still have yet to get on base, but i came up with a good defensive strategy and accounted for several outs.

The aftergame was good. OCD Anxiety girl tried to invite herself to it, but I told her I wanted to have my own space and not have a little puppy dog following me around and criticizing who I talk to. So what, I flirt. Get over it.

Have a good time I did. I completely dominated a Flip Cup challenge by flipping my 4 cups in the time he flipped only two. The victory was sweet.

This incredibly hot chick from the other team invited me to a party their team was hosting Saturday night. But, she disappeared before I could find out WHERE it was...

I successfully got one other fine lass' (She's on the right, Jeremy, those aren't her eyes...) phone number and gave mine to two others. I'll see how your advice holds up Captain B!


It was the night of plans that died. Had planned to go to a party, it got cancelled. Had been invited to another party Thursday, but the person with that info never called. Big Mike was going to come over and crash at my place to avoid staying at his house with his cheating wife, but he got sick after a dinner with co-workers. So I ended up watching DVD's.


this is where the Hot Chick's should have been or where I was going to have a housewarming party til the possibility of having to go out of town came up.

Got up and went with OCD Anxiety and some other people to the Farmer's Market then brunch. Met up with Big Mike and hung out with him for a little while before he had to go to work. Went to dinner with a friend I hadn't heard from in over two months. Glad to find out he wasn't dead! Later Big Mike went out with my neighbor/his best friends Ex to do a covert op for the best friend and find out if she's dating anyone else yet. I went with the rest of the guys Downtown and got our drink on.


Got up and went to Grand Old Day. Gotta love a 30 block long street party with 11 (Eleven!!) stages of live music. Hung out at OCD-Anxiety's place because she lives on the street they have the party on. Consumed much whiskey and some other random alcohol. After the music was done OCD invited pretty much everyone who was out in front of her building up to play flip cup in her apartment. At one point while OCD was taking care of a drunk friend in her room and the rest of us were still playing Flip Cup, the girl next to me got pretty friendly and we got about 1 inch from making out until the brain kicked in and realized that would end up horribly messy. I did slip her my number later though. Of course, later OCD freaked out and got mad that her apartment was a mess... You invite 12 drunk people to you place and expect it to stay clean??? The rest of the night was baby-sitting drunks until I went home and started watching Garden State until Big Mike showed up. The talked about The Wife until she called and sucked him into coming home because she couldn't walk due to a blister on her foot. Riiiiight.

Good weekend. Definitely got some good drinking in. The liver successfully processed a couple liters of Whiskey and I got back into dating mode a little better. This weekend is a wedding with Conservative Girl. Not looking forward to that. I don't think hardly any of her family or friends actually knows how to party. Oh well.

Back to being productive for the week.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 12:24 PM, ,

TGI Monday. Sort of.

Yay, Internet! Boooooooo, work. :O(

It sucks not having internet at home, it's been so long since I haven't had megabit+ connection at home. This whole trying to save money thing is getting annyoing. I've had high-speed way to long to get dial up, it'd just piss me off. Oh well.

I called in sick on friday, partially because I was hung-over, but mostly because I had to get stuff done, like go downtown and dispute a parking ticket.

It was a busy weekend, I'll have to give an update in a little bit.

Is it sad that I missed the internet on a 3 day weekend?


posted by Chief Slacker @ 10:16 AM, ,

I'm a Rage Filled Squirrel

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Apparently, of all the Neurotically Yours characters, I'm Foamy.

Foamy Rocks!

You are Foamy.
Congratulations, you are a rage filled squirrel who
spouts his views at any given moment. You know
what you like, (bagels with cream cheese) and
what you don't. (everything else) Chill out
before you give yourself an ulcer.

Which Neurotically Yours (Foamy) Character are you???
brought to you by Quizilla

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:59 AM, ,

Redhead Update

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

So I called the cell phone number the Redhead gave me. A girl answered, that sounded something like her, but told me it was the wrong number.

I called and left a message on her work voice mail inviting her out with the rest of the kickball crew tomorrow night. Also left my number

Anyone wanna drop odds on ever actually hearing from her? heh

posted by Chief Slacker @ 7:38 PM, ,

Psycho #2 takes the lead

So apparently the whole psycho talk of a couple posts ago somehow subliminally made it to OCD-Anxiety Girl. She must have caught wind that I was comparing her psycho-ness to someone else and had to raise the bar.

Last night she called and asked if I wanted to meet her and another friend for a drink on a newly built patio of an Irish bar downtown. Since it was a beautiful day, I couldn't turn that down.

So we go have a few drinks, then when she's giving me a ride home, she decides that either I should sleep over at her place or she should sleep over at mine.


Bad plan.

All the reasons I gave her didn't seem to sink in. A. Dating someone, B. You've been drinking and you'll try and get frisky and I don't want that, C. Dating someone, D. I never slept all that well when we used to sleep together, E. DATING SOMEONE.

So I get out of the car, she's all upset and drives off. In true OCD-AD girl form, she calls 20 minutes later telling me how I don't care because I didn't call to make sure she made the 12 block drive home ok. She's not good enough to hang out with and I never care enough to do this and that. How come she's not good enough to date? Why is she such a bad person? Why can't I be nice to her? She was just digging herself this big hole in the middle of her very own pity-fest. The phone convo ended when she said something like "If you're going to be that mean to me then stop talking to me." So I said "Ok" and hung up.

She called and left a 3 minute voicemail after that saying all the same pity-fest things all over.

At what point does it stop being worth it to be friends with someone?

I've been as nice as I can. I give her reassuring answers like "You are good enough and worth dating. I don't think otherwise, but our personalities don't make for a good match." She's fine with that up until the "but." All she ever wants to hear are positives, yet all she ever brings up are negatives. I'm a both sides of the coin kinda guy, but all she ever wants to her is what will make her happy. Problem is if that's all I say, I'm leading her on and making her think I want to date when I don't.

It's a no-win situation it seems. If I'm nice to her she takes it as wanting to date and I'm leading her on. If I stand up to her and be realistic to try and make her see we're not compatible, or stop letting her push me into something, I'm an asshole.

Any sane person would have probably stopped talking to her a long time ago, but not me. I'm too nice to be the asshole and say "piss off, stop talking to me." At the same time though, I'm sick of having to deal with that crap.

Hi Rock! Hi Hard Place! I think we're going to be good friends.

posted by Chief Slacker @ 9:48 AM, ,