The Not-So-Great Second Date
Thursday, December 13, 2007So this past weekend, Miss Intrigue and Spott came to the Twin Cities for a visit. I considered tossing an announcement up on the blog, but didn't want to jinx the weekend in hopes it would be as fun a time as my visit out there was!
Unfortunately this was not to be the case.
The ladies rolled into the Twin Cities on Saturday around 2. Due to the fact Miss I works nights and Spott was behind on homework and packing, neither had slept. Miss I was tired yet happy, though Spott had an intensely negative vibe going on.
I gave them a really brief tour of the Twin Cities on the way back to Slacker HQ. We saw the Mall of America, the University of MN campus and a few other things on the way back from the airport. When we arrived home the girls promptly settled in for a nap. I got a hint of my own negative vibe there simply because this girl I totally adore was napping on my futon and all I could do was play Warcraft. Boo to that! I got over it though. Ms. I was here!!
The post nap plan was to find food, and then head out to see a friend of mine, Pandora's, cabaret and burlesque troupe perform. Unfortunately she wouldn't be performing, but we thought it would be fun anyway. MI and I grabbed some quick grub while Spott declined even though she hadn't eaten for most of the day. We watched a good chunk of Superbad then loaded up for the bar the show would be at! We got there early on advice from Pandora, got a nice table and relaxed.
Unfortunately the show didn't get going on time and eventually was about 40 minutes late. This turned out to be a good and a bad thing since Conservative girl and her boyfriend Army Boy were joining us and would be late. On the downside the girls were still tired and sitting around with nothing going on didn't help.
Miss Intrigue and I had some good convo, but most conversation with Spott was met with fairly chilly short responses. When CG and the man arrived the conversation livened up some more, though still mostly with Ms. I and myself. Spott was clearly agitate most of the night and only got talking with AB asked her some direct question that were hard to answer yes or no. Luckily the show was pretty entertaining to keep us all going!
When intermission came however the energy left with the performers. Army Boy had been playing soccer all day and was dead tired, as were the girls so we all headed out. Some of Spott's mood may have been due to the fact her stomach finally wanted attention so we stopped off so she could get a cheese pizza on the way home. The negativity in the air was getting to me so while they were grabbing pizza, I stopped in next door at Stub and Herb's for a quick Whiskey Diet.
When we got home I retreated to the office for a bit to clear my head while while Spott ate pizza and Miss I hung out. At one point MI came in to check on me and was quickly followed by Spott wanting to know where she had gone and why she left the living room. This did not help the negativity. I was determined not to let it get to me though so we all went out and watched the end of Superbad. Miss I said she enjoyed it, Spott thought it lived up to it's name. After that sleep was in order.
I unfortunately slept incredibly poorly and was up by about 6am. Once everyone got up we decided the goals for the day would be to stop by the Spoon Bridge with Cherry at the Minneapolis Sculpture Garden and also visit the Mall of America.
We stopped by the Spoon and Cherry so Miss Intrigue could get a picture. Spott didn't get the concept of taking a picture of something you've seen tons of pictures fo, but it was fun anyway albeit very cold.
Next was the MoA, which upon entering we found out we could be part of "The World's Largest Christmas Carol" by joining in a promotion for the Alvin and the Chipmunks movie. We wandered the Mall and eventually met up for the event. We joined in a huge group of people in singing the Chipmunks Carol and supposedly broke the world record for largest carol. So, Miss I, Spott and yours truly are supposedly now in the record books! The only downside to this may have been that it delayed lunch, and other plans for the day and may have inadvertently added to lingering negativity. We hit up the Rainforest Cafe and then did some shopping to round out the MoA trip.
The ride home was very quiet. The lingering negativity and probably some of the tired in the car seemed to keep everyone's mouths glued shut. Since the girls were tired it was decided to be nap time again so they crashed on the futon. My own negativity had started to get the better of me at that point too due to the weekend seemingly having a cloud over it the whole time, so I went and played some WoW to distract myself. By the time it was time to wake up my head had cleared a good bit.
Miss I had asked me to wake her up at 7:30 so I did. Since I know I had some negative vibes here and there I wanted to chat with her and apologize and hopefully get the weekend finished on a good note. Unfortunately, this is where Date Dos imploded.
Miss Intrigue and I went into my room and shut the door. We sat down on the bed and started talking. By talking I mean just that, good conversation, not this "talking" some of you silly kids call your shenanigans. A couple minutes later MI gets a text message from Spott, wanting to know why we shut the door. MI replied so we could talk. Spott didn't get why we had to shut the door. MI asked if Spott didn't trust her and the reply was that she didn't trust me. The messages spiraled downward from there to the point where Spott said she was leaving, grabbed her coat and headed out my back door. The next couple hours would definitely not hit the highlight reel.
MI got Spott to come back inside after some conversing. I let them talk and stayed out of the way in my room. It turns out the trust Spott had in me after The First Date had completely disappeared. Her reasoning is because of two pretty nasty screw ups on my part: Telling MI's Ma about and incident her MI and S had, leading to a week of garbage, and the Thursday night of the Packers-Cowboys game where I apparently had a drink or three to many and was, in short, a jackass and acted exceptionally uncharacteristically. There was also talk of hating bars and thinking anyone who went to them was a waste of time, and how she was upset MI didn't hold her hand whenever Spott offered it the previous night. There was much other talk, not a lot of it all that great.
Once things calmed down. Miss I put on a movie for Spott and her and I headed to the office to partake in illicit, err umm totally legal in every way, file transferring. These files may or may not have been of a musical nature. It was good to get a little alone time even if it was platonic. We did talk a bit and I was able to say some of the things I had hoped to say before the blow-up, but not nearly enough. After MI got all the mu, err, legal files, she wanted. We talked a bit and then she convinced me to come out and join in the movie watching. We tossed in The Avengers which MI managed to see about a total of 40 minutes of when she wasn't visiting sleepville.
The next morning came far to fast and I had to take them to the airport far to early. The flights were decent and they made it home safe.
Definitely not a superb weekend. I was most definitely happy to see Miss I, but the weekend went far far far from planned. Our feelings and chemistry definitely were there, but it seemed like a cloud was just determined to rain on the entire weekend.
The rain didn't stop there either. The next day I checked my email. It contained a message from Spott. She stated if I went out to NY again I should plan on a hotel because I was no longer welcome in her home, and that I should never talk to her again. Obviously this concerned and saddened me.
One, I've always done my best to go out of my way to be kind and inclusive of Spott. I've gone to the extent of totally reigning in my typical self around her to be sure not to offend. I know I made mistakes with MI, but made sure not to do anything offensive directly to Spott. Even to the fact that I let it go after she completely blew away any respect for my privacy in my own home.
I know the whole situation has upset Miss Intrigue as well. We've only talked in short spurts since they got back. We seem to be able to touch each other's feelings and what was stress, is now just stuck in numb. This pains me because it's someone i deeply care about, but I can't do much to help. My normal reaction would be to push and try my best to cheer her up but I'm not sure that can work in this situation. Another typical reaction would be to email Spott back and try to iron things out, but I'm afraid of that backfiring and not helping the situation either. I think all I can do is give some space and hope things work out. We all know my brain is not a happy camper doing that. I'm a fixer, and I hope this whole thing can be fixed, but i guess only time will tell.
So yeah, the second date was definitely not great. Though, I guess at the least, it was one for the record books.
posted by Chief Slacker @ 1:50 PM,
1 Comments:
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At Sat Dec 15, 08:19:00 AM,
OzzyC said...
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Sounds like Spott's a passive-aggressive bitch. She acts pissy but won't tell you why. She tells you off via email. She's not worth your time.